Phillies Beat Reds 22-1 In Complete Domination

July 7, 2009 by  
Filed under Fan News

There is no other way to describe a game that was expected to be a pitcher’s duel and wound up looking more like an exhibition between a defending World Series champion and the local little league squad sponsored by Dairy Queen.

The July 4th holiday has come and gone, but the annual fireworks games at Citizens Bank Park are not scheduled until the end of the week. However, the Phils’ lineup did their part to continue the fireworks exhibitions in Philadelphia by beating Cincinnati last night in every facet of the game (offense, defense, pitching), cruising to a 22-1 victory.

Everything unfolded rather quickly for Reds starting pitcher Johnny Cueto, who lasted just two thirds of an inning and was charged with nine-earned runs. Jimmy Rollins lead off with a walk and the Final Vote candidate for the All-Star game, Shane Victorino, provided some Hawaiian Punch with a two-run home run.

With two outs, Greg Dobbs connected for another two-run home run to give the Phillies a 4-0 lead. With the Phillies building a 7-0 lead in the first and with two runners on base, Reds manager had no choice but to pull his starting pitcher. After Cueto left the game, Chase Utley hit a three-run home run off of Reds pitcher Daniel Herrera.

The offense continued to have their way by scoring six runs over the next three innings. Things got so out of hand for the Reds that Baker decided to send in shortstop Paul Janish to pitch the eighth inning.

In his second appearance on the mound this season, Janish was hit hard by the Phillies. Janish walked two batters and gave up four hits, including a grand slam by Jayson Werth, who capped off the evening by representing the Phillies’ 22nd run of the evening. Janish took one for his team and allowed six runs in the eighth.

Not to be lost on the night of offensive fireworks was the performance of starter Cole Hamels, who needed a good game as his previous two outings were poor.

The ace of the staff got the job done on the mound, going seven full innings, allowing just three hits, one of which was a solo home run in the second inning. The strike outs were rare though as Hamels only recorded two strike outs, but he walked none.

Hamels also helped his own cause at the plate by hitting a key two-out double in the first inning, scoring two runs on the play. With two hits, two runs batted in and two runs scored, Hamels actually had a better offensive night than Ryan Howard, who went one-for-four.

Scott Eyre returned to action from his stint on the disabled list. The veteran lefty pitched the ninth inning with the Phillies holding on to a 21-run lead. Eyre gave up a pair of hits but struck out two batters and did not allow a run despite having two men in scoring position.

The Phillies set a season high with 21 hits on the night. The 10 first-inning runs tied a franchise high.

The 22 runs are fifth most in a game in franchise history and the most since scoring 26 against the Mets in 1985. The margin of victory is the largest in Phillies’ franchise history and the worst defeat in the Reds’ 140-year franchise history.

Article Source: Bleacher Report - Philadelphia Phillies

Philadelphia Phillies Favorites: Single Game Performances

July 6, 2009 by  
Filed under Fan News

During the Phillies 126 year existence, they have had:

a. Nine pitchers throw a no-hitter

b. One pitcher pitch a perfect game

c. Eight batters hit for the cycle

d. Three batters hit four home runs in one game

All of these players were great. Some were all-stars. Some of them are Hall of Famers.

And some are on the list of the Phillies greatest single game performances.

Article Source: Bleacher Report - Philadelphia Phillies

Why Vote For Victorino? Here’s Why

July 6, 2009 by  
Filed under Fan News

Shane Victorino, the feisty and gritty center fielder for the Phillies, is among the nominees for the National League’s final roster spot for the 2009 All Star game. His competition is Cristian Guzman of the Nationals, Matt Kemp of the Dodgers, Mark Reynolds of the Diamondbacks, and Pablo Sandoval of the Giants.

So how does Victorino stand up against the other nominees?

At first glance it may appear that Reynolds could be a favorite based on his power numbers, but Victorino holds his own and should be the winner of the final vote.

Let’s look at Victorino’s numbers…

Right off the bat, hitting for a .300 average is nothing to be upset about. What the stats don’t tell you above is that Victorino has the fewest strike outs (39) than any of his competition, yet has the most at bats (320), meaning Victorino strikes out 12 percent of the time. His competition?

  • Reynolds strikes out 36.9 percent of the time (111 SO in 301 AB)
  • Kemp strikes out 24.5 percent of the time (74 SO in 302 AB)
  • Sandoval strikes out 15.4 percent of the time (43 SO in 279 AB)
  • Guzman strikes out 14.5 percent of the time (42 SO in 289 AB)

Throw in the fact that Victorino has the second most walks (32) among the Final Vote candidates and it may turn some heads. Only Reynolds has been given a free base more times with 38.

Victorino, with five home runs, is second from the bottom in that category, but everybody knows that power is not his game. Still that could detract some votes for fans who look for home runs.

What Victorino does offer that no other candidate can is Gold Glove caliber defense. Victorino picked up his first career Gold Glove award for his play in center field last year.

If your team is looking for a clutch double play then you better hope that Victorino is not the batter. Victorino has hit into just two double plays this season, fewest among his final vote candidates.

Victorino’s two double plays are half as many as the next fewest (four for Sandoval). To be fair though, batting second behind a struggling Jimmy Rollins has vastly limited Victorino’s opportunities to hit into double plays this season.

On the flip side though, you have to wonder how Victorino’s RBI would look if Rollins was on track from the start of the season. Victorino has 31 extra base hits, and if Rollins had his offensive game in check you would have to imagine that Victorino’s RBI numbers would increase to a certain level.

With 35 RBI in the second spot in the lineup, you could expect his total to raise by at least ten runs if Rollins was getting on base from the start of the season in the leadoff spot.

There are some good arguments for a few of the Final Vote candidates on the National League squad, but the favorite should be Victorino.

Article Source: Bleacher Report - Philadelphia Phillies

Barack Obama to Mets: “Go Cure Malaria Like You Cured the Phillies” (Satire)

July 5, 2009 by  
Filed under Fan News

After watching the New York Mets be swept by the Philadelphia Phillies again, President Barack Obama made his boldest move yet of his young presidency.

“The New York Mess, er, Mets have been declared as ‘The Cure For What Ails You,'” said Obama to an emergency session of the United Nations. “Therefore, it is with great pride that we are sending them on a worldwide tour to cure malaria.

“Look, if they can cure the Phillies, they can cure anything.”

The announcement was met by thunderous applause, especially in sub-Saharan Africa, Southeast Asia, and Queens.

“Anyting to get dese bums outta here,” said Nicky from Yonkers on WFAN. “Just don’t let dat mamaluke (Mets second baseman Luis) Castillo near anyting important. He’ll drop it.”

“Castillo, you suck!” he added.

Zambian President Rupiah Banda said that the Mets will be greeted with open arms.

“These great heroes will save the lives of thousands of Zambian children,” said Banda from behind a mosquito net emblazoned with the Mets’ logo. “The fact that they can’t hit, field, or give any run support to one of the greatest pitchers in the league today means all the world to us.”

“Anybody that can break (Phillies shortstop Jimmy) Rollins out of the worst slump of his career can certainly deal with something as simple as malaria.”

“Let’s Go Mets!” he added, clapping rhythmically.

Rollins whole-heartedly supported the plan as well.

“As long as they come back before our next series with them, I’m all for it,” said Rollins, who entered the three game series with only one hit in his last, like, million at-bats. “They certainly cured my slump.”

“Forget fat girls, the Mets are the real slump-busters.”

Mets pitcher Johan Santana balked at first. “Hey, look, I do my part. I can’t help it that this bullpen is incapable of holding a lead, and that Luis (Castillo) can’t catch a cold standing in a hospital room full of feverish three year olds. I’m not going.”

Santana later relented when reminded that he gave up Rollins’ first home run since the Reagan Administration.

Even Brad Lidge, who has an ERA over 7.00, picked up two saves in the series. “Yeah, my head hasn’t been right all year,” said Lidge, who wasn’t even sweating after striking out the side in the ninth to earn his sixteenth save of the year, even though he has blown six saves—some in spectacular fashion—this season.

“I really wasn’t sure if I would ever pitch effectively again in the majors. I thank my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ for the New York Mets, and those malaria stricken people soon will also.”

It is reported that Pamela Anderson is currently in negotiations to have the Mets come to her house to cure her after they are done with malaria. 

Article Source: Bleacher Report - Philadelphia Phillies

Could the Philadelphia Phillies Acquire Javier Vazquez?

July 5, 2009 by  
Filed under Fan News

The rumors of the Phils being interested in Chien-Ming Wang (and actually making an offer to the Yankees for him) are probably dead in the water after he left today’s game with shoulder issues.

So what are the chances, if any, that the Braves would deal starter Javier Vazquez to their heated division rival?

The Braves are getting to the point where they have decide whether they’re buyers, sellers, or stand-patters (is that a word?). Players who a year ago were thought to be cornerstones, like Yunel Escobar and Jeff Franceour, are said to be available—as is the recently acquired Vazquez.

They made a move earlier this season when they acquired outfielder Nate McLouth from the Pirates, but haven’t made tremendous progress since he came on board.

With young starters Jair Jurrjens and Tommy Hanson looking like building blocks for the next decade, the Braves might not be opposed to sending the soon-to-be 33-year old Vazquez north for some decent  prospects, and look to compete in 2010 and beyond.

Vazquez is only 5-7 in 17 starts, but he has a stellar 3.05 ERA—and, even more impressive, a 1.07 WHIP. Pair that with his 130/23 K/BB ratio and you have a guy who could help a struggling rotation (taking away this weekend’s sweep of a terrible Mets team) in a big way.

Would you give up Carlos Carrasco, Jason Donald, and maybe a Zach Collier for Vazquez?

He’s signed through 2010 (at the beginning of the season, Vazquez was signed through 2010 for a total of $23 million).

Furthermore, the Braves only gave up prospects—Tyler Flowers, third baseman Jon Gilmore, pitcher Santos Rodriguez and infielder Brent Lillibrigde—when they acquired him from the White Sox this past off-season.

None of them are expected to be stars.

As far as postseason performance is concerned, the jury is still out on whether Javier can be a big game pitcher. He

faltered down the stretch with the White Sox in 2008 and has been rocked in his three postseason appearances. He has a career 10.34 ERA in 15.2 post-season innings).

Still, the guy can get folks out, and he may be the most talented pitcher available this summer.

What would you give up for him? If you’re the Braves, would you sell him to a division rival? Do you even want him?

All good questions.

[firedforwinning.com]

Article Source: Bleacher Report - Philadelphia Phillies

Jimmy Rollins Ignites Phillies To Series Sweep Of The Mets

July 5, 2009 by  
Filed under Fan News

As I was heading home to southern New Jersey from a Wimbledon party just outside of Philadelphia, I drove by Citizens Bank Park in southern Philadelphia on the way to the Walt Whitman Bridge and peeked into the stadium while driving.

All I saw was a sea of red.

The Phillies, on their way to the World Series, took care of business at home.

Something they have not done so far this season, until now.

Yes, you’ve got Ryan Church hitting clean up followed by Nick Evans, Jeremy Reed and Brian Schneider for the Mets. Not likely to scare any opposing pitcher.

But for the Mets, they had Johan Santana on the hill. The ace of the Mets’ staff.

I knocked Jimmy Rollins recently for his play, but he has redeemed himself this weekend. Rollins led off the game with a solo home run, which would stand until Chase Utley connected for a solo shot in the sixth.

The double play was the pitcher’s friend as the Mets grounded into two of them. Joe Blanton out pitched Santana and the Phillies completed their sweep of a depleted New York Mets team.

The win gave the Phillies a one-game lead over the Florida Marlins, and four games over the Atlanta Braves and New York Mets.

The Phillies continue their home stand against the Cincinnati Reds and Pittsburgh Pirates, while New York and Florida head to Los Angeles and San Francisco, respectively. The Braves open a series with the Cubs.

No sense beating a dead horse about putting space between you and your rivals, but I am glad the Phillies took care of business and swept the Mets. It keeps them firmly in first place in the National League East, when they could have just as easily fallen into second or third.

Rollins raised his average to .217 during the weekend series, getting at least one hit in each game.

When Rollins reaches base, things happen for the Phillies and that is a good sign. Closer Brad Lidge looked good also, striking out the side for his 16th save of the season.

Without getting into detail, I feel much better about the team and am confident they will stay in first leading into the All-Star break.

Note: Speaking of the All-Star break, two of the three starting outfielders may not compete in the game. The Phillies’ Raul Ibanez, The Brewers’ Ryan Braun, and the Mets’ Carlos Beltran were the top vote getters. Both Ibanez and Braun are on the disabled list and may not play. Just an odd circumstance and for sure, an irony, especially for Mets’ fans.

Article Source: Bleacher Report - Philadelphia Phillies

Phillies-Braves Series Sweep: Hmm, That Went Well

July 3, 2009 by  
Filed under Fan News

Atlanta had the Phillies’ number: 8-6-7-5-3-0-9.

 

Whoops, sorry. That’s Jenny’s number.

 

The Braves were dialed in on Phillies’ pitching.

 

In Thursday’s Philadelphia Inquirer, the banner article on the sports page focused on the hoard of pitching talent residing in the Phillies’ minor league system. But the article curiously didn’t mention a guy named Rodrigo Lopez, yet he’s the choice to start Friday’s home series with the Mets.

 

I’m in the dark on this one.

 

Lopez hasn’t pitched in the majors since 2007 when he underwent Tommy John surgery. Maybe Ruben Amaro Jr. is thinking he has another Jayson Werth-type “diamond in the rough” prospect on his hands. If that’s the case, maybe I should keep a spot open in my “Phillies’ Playmate of the Week” calendar.

 

But the article failed to mention why suddenly the Phils are spotlighting their pitching prospects. Either every team in the MLB has decided they’re a postseason contender and aren’t willing to trade real pitchers for prospects (but Ruben doesn’t want to tell us), or the Phils are trying to convince other teams they have the talent to trade.

 

Can you smell propaganda?

 

That brings us to the current pitching problems.

 

On Tuesday, things seemed to be going okay. Joe Blanton gave up some hits, but kept them in the ballgame until Ryan Madson took over in the sixth. Madson then put enough guys on base to tie the game, before Chan Ho Park gave up the game-winning run in the 10th inning.

 

Then Wednesday, Cole Hamels stunk again and the bullpen could do nothing to dispense of the odor. They say that’s because his pitches were up. Funny, in that kind of heat, I thought balls always hung a little low.

 

High balls are how Phillies’ pitchers made Atlanta hitters quite comfortable at the plate in game two. Postgame commentator, Ricky Bottalico, said he was disgusted that the pitching staff spoon fed the Braves a level of batting ease that rivaled a comfy round of crumpets and tea.

 

Well, obviously I’m paraphrasing, but his point was the batters should have been sweating beads because the pitchers should have been shooting at their feet.

 

Where has the pitching coach been through all of this?

 

Instead, Hamels gave up nine hits on 88 pitches and even allowed a single by the pitcher with a sloppy selection of pitches, while cursing the umpire again. Tyler Walker gave up two home runs in the fifth to earn his first earned run of the season and help Hamels close out his line with seven earned runs over four innings.

 

Then Jack Taschner lived up to his nickname “Trash-ner” when he added a few runs to the Braves’ lead before they shut down the Phillies’ offense in the ninth for an 11-1 loss.

 

Then came game three.

 

What’s happening to Ryan Madson?

 

My husband swears I put a curse on Madson when he signed my backpack at the Winner’s Circle in Exton, Pennsylvania. But I swear I didn’t touch him. And you have no clue how much restraint that took.

 

CSN and now MLB.TV sportscaster, Mitch Williams, says Madson lost his confidence in his first blown save in the absence of Brad Lidge. He says Madson isn’t throwing his changeup, and that’s a confidence pitch.

 

Well, there you have it—straight from the Wild Thing’s mouth. I love Mitch. I have his autograph on my backpack too. He appeared at my Giant grocery store to promote his salsa and I got his signature.

 

I know what you’re thinking—I’m a stalker. Really I’m not, I just play one on Bleacher Report.

 

In the end, the Braves handed Philadelphia their first series sweep in Atlanta since 2005 and gave a fourth straight win to their fans in the stands—all 10 of them.

 

It’s been so long since I experienced any euphoria over the Phillies’ performance, it feels like I’m married.

 

Whoops, that’s right. I am.

 

Things could be worse. The team could be anticipating the return of their greatest offensive contributor only to get the news that his rehab assignment has been postponed.

 

Whoops, that’s right. The return of Raul Ibanez has been delayed.

 

Let’s look on the bright side.

 

Jimmy Rollins broke his 0-for-27 streak, at least for now. I hope he starts a 27-for-27 streak because the Mets love nothing more than coming to town when Philadelphia is feeling down.

 

And right now I think they’ve reached pitch black.

 

See you at the ballpark.

 

Article Source: Bleacher Report - Philadelphia Phillies

Mets, Phillies Battle For First

July 3, 2009 by  
Filed under Fan News

Could first place be around the corner?

 

The current batch of Mets players have been berated in all forms of media all week.

 

“We can’t win like this”

 

“These players aren’t very good.”

 

Even the manager got into the act by asking for more offense and saying that it’d be tough to win with the current guys.

 

Despite all that, the Mets have now won two in a row, one with pitching and one with hitting. They will go into Philadelphia with a chance to take first place, sitting just one game behind the Phillies. (and the Marlins)

 

The Phillies aren’t playing great baseball either. In fact, the pitcher the Mets faced in Pittsburgh, Paul Maholm, has a better ERA than the Phillies ace Cole Hamels, and the two pitchers in the rotation the Mets are facing this weekend.

 

The other pitcher, Rodrigo Lopez, is a journeyman pitcher who hasn’t pitched in the majors in two years. Lopez, coming off Tommy John surgery, signed with the Braves last year, pitching five innings in the minors, and was released at the end of the season.

 

He’s nearly given up a home run a start in his career, which will go over well in that ballpark, and his best year came in Baltimore in 2002.

 

He was 5-4 with a 3.91 ERA in the minors this year.

 

So the pitching landscape the Mets will face this weekend is not great. The lineup isn’t what it would be with Reyes, Delgado and Beltran in it, but most of these guys are still major leaguers, or prospects, and should be able to score some runs in a ballpark that lends itself to scoring runs.

 

The worry may be on the pitching side.

 

Livan Hernandez has been pitching well and hopefully he can keep the Phillies in the park. Fernando Nieve is basically an unknown, having had three excellent starts and one bad one.

 

Has he been properly scouted by now? Have the Phillies read the scouting reports? Or was last time just a blip, and he’ll bounce back with a good performance?

 

Sunday is almost a must-win with Johan Santana on the mound. He’s a competitive guy, and nothing is more competitive than a competition for first place, against rivals, after a bad performance in his last outing.

 

Expect good things from Santana on Sunday, which is also the halfway point in the season. Santana typically pitches well in the second half. A lot hinges on Hernandez tonight.

 

The Phillies bats have been sleeping, and it would do us good not to wake them up.

 

Bad games, horrible losses, injuries, and bad managing in the first half can all be put aside this weekend. If the Mets play competitive baseball for these three days, the first half ends and the second half begins without any handicap or ground to make up.

 

Beltran and Reyes may both be back before we know it, and it’d be an excellent situation to be in if they come back and not have to help the Mets play catchup, but to help the Mets put distance between them and whoever is in second come that point.

 

Article Source: Bleacher Report - Philadelphia Phillies

Phillies Limp Home for Important NL East Series with Mets

July 3, 2009 by  
Filed under Fan News

It certainly is a long way from Oct. 29, 2008.

That is the day when the Philadelphia Phillies celebrated their second World Championship of baseball, having defeated the Tampa Bay Rays four games to one.

Oh yes, the Phillies are still in first place, although tied with the Marlins for first. The Phillies, losers of 12 of their last 15, are 39-37, while the Marlins are 41-39.

What lies ahead? Either a chance to squash a division opponent, or as my picture displays, sit in a pile of dog poo.

‘Cause while the Phillies and the Mets beat each other up at Citizens Bank Park in Philadelphia for a three-game series, the Marlins are at home to face the Pirates and Atlanta plays at Washington.

Um, excuse me? Are the baseball gods laughing at Philadelphia and New York? ‘Cause you can’t expect the Pirates or the Nationals to take more than one game in their series, although the Pirates, losers of their last two, are more likely to play spoiler.

Stranger things have happened. The Mets, who are one game off the pace, are without Carlos Delgado and J.J. Putz, and Jose Reyes and Carlos Beltran have both spent time on the disabled list.

Mets fans cry, “Wait ’til everyone gets off the disabled list.”

Phils fans howl, “Hey, we are still the World Champions.”

My feeling? Atlanta, two games out of first, is ready to take the throne. Their pitching is getting better, the bats are hot, and the Nationals are God-awful.

The Braves, who just swept the Phillies at home, are a better team then the Marlins.

The Mets and Phillies, the preseason favorites, are in good company with each other, both playing dog ball.

Go figure. Jimmy Rollins was 2-for-4 last night. Maybe that’s a good sign.

Livan Hernandez (5-3) faces 33-year-old Triple-A call-up Rodrigo Lopez. Hernandez has been very good lately, and it could favor the Mets.

On the positive side, Phils fans know that at any time, against any pitcher, they can post a 10-spot on the scoreboard.

They better, or the Marlins and the Braves will be ready to pounce.

My prediction?

Atlanta sweeps, Marlins take two of three, and the Mets take two of three.

That’s not good news for the Phillies.

But as a Phillies fan, I am in a very, very dark place.

Owwuuuuuu, woof, woof, woof.

Article Source: Bleacher Report - Philadelphia Phillies

What Happens When Mean Boys Take Over a Blog Site

July 2, 2009 by  
Filed under Fan News

It’s a tough world out there. And blogging is no exception.

 

Recently, a bunch of readers attempted to coerce me from posting to a site called The Good Phight on SB Nation. For your convenience, you can click on those words and it’ll take you there.

 

Isn’t technology great?

 

Basically their beef is that they only want to read news from statisticians and don’t want to be bothered with any opinion on the game outside of graphs that post the Phillies performance on an X/Y axis or ideas aside from numbers that affect a player’s BABIP.

 

A BABIP? Can I calculate that on a slide rule or should I fetch a pipette?

 

Trust me, I get the BABIP. It’s the batting average of balls hit into play and is a method of determining a player’s future value in fantasy baseball. But there’s not a stat in the world that’ll tell you why the Phil’s ruled in come-from-behind wins early in the season and now can’t post one to save their skin. Or when Jimmy Rollins will get his groove back, or what identity Brett Myers with pitch with when he returns.

 

My favorite comment was written by a guy who was so disgusted that he’d spent his only five minutes that day to try to update himself on Phillies stats by reading my article called, “And You Thought Steroids Were No Laughing Matter.”

 

What part of my title infers that it’s a game recap? Then, instead of simply ignoring my blogs, he used another five minutes of his time to write me a very lengthy request to stop posting.

 

Is that an oxymoron?

 

Is that an actual moron?

 

Funny how technically advanced these readers are, yet most of those who posted comments are unacquainted with the shift keys on either side of the keyboard that are responsible for creating capital letters.

 

And it’s obvious most of them need to review a manual on grammar or better yet, read the contents of the First Amendment.

 

Here’s a banner idea. If a blog is posted by someone you don’t want to follow—don’t read it.

 

No, they couldn’t possibly do that. That’s a great piece of advice from someone they don’t want to read, but now they can’t take the advice because it was crafted by someone they didn’t want to read in the first place but were mystically forced to click on their blog.

 

Ahhhhh! It’s a vicious cycle!

 

So Good Phight guys, here’s the deal. When I post something that has the little words “A Babe’s Take” listed as the blogger’s name under the title, don’t click on it. Don’t do it! Stop yourself! Take control, or better yet devise your own 12-step program to deal with it because this three-step program is mine:

 

1.      Get

2.      A

3.      Life

 

Just stop your pointer finger from clicking on my blog because I could care less if your middle finger relays to me what you truly think of my posts.

 

And if you continue to coerce me from posting on this site I’ll start posting more. And I’ll follow that with recipes from Charlie Manuel and holiday gift ideas for baseball lovers from Martha Stewart.

 

I might even contact that lady from Hints from Heloise to gather stain fighting tips for the players who tarnish their uniforms on a slide, or worse yet, start collaborating on blog ideas with my grandma.

 

And for your information, a frequent reader of The Good Phight secretly emailed me to let me know this would happen, yet he encouraged me to keep posting.

 

So let me tell you what you can expect when you see that I’ve listed another blog. I’m a hundred pounds of pure babe and this is my skinny on the Phillies. I have words and I’m not afraid to use them. I’ve even been known to share facts via cheesy poetry. But be warned, Dr. Suess is my idol.

 

Matter-of-fact I feel a poem coming on now. Nope, sorry that was a side effect of tacos.

 

Here’s the poem.

 

Ode to Mean Boys

 

Do not read my blog today

‘cause now you know it’s not your taste.

I’ve been known to skirt the stats

And post a blog that’s causes laughs.

 

I sometimes write these in a car

And sometimes when I’m driving far.

And at the bar

And on a star

While drinking from a Mason jar.

 

I love the Phils and I love men.

I’m sometimes like a mother hen.

I will not stop what’s in my head.

I will not fear what lies ahead.

 

So read my posts if you can make

A cake from scratch for your blind date.

But rest assured I mean to stay

And post my thoughts upon your page.

 

There. Put that in your pipette and BAP it.

 

The rest of you I’ll see at the ballpark.

Article Source: Bleacher Report - Philadelphia Phillies

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