Top 10 Things I Learned from the Phillies vs Rockies NLDS

10) Todd Helton may have rejuvenated his career with back surgery, but it doesn’t work against left handed pitchers.

9) Philly Fan shouldn’t complain about Charlie Manuel and his hunches ever again, but will.

8) The Rockies clearly needed more Kyle Orton.

7) Watching poorly timed baseball playoff games that are being covered by undiagnosed depressives is, somehow, even less fun than watching coverage on Fox or ESPN.

6) Colorado’s biggest failure was in not getting Cliff Lee’s wife pregnant and due to deliver in October.

5) No matter how good your stuff is or how hard you throw, there’s just something less than intimidating about guys named Ubaldo.

4) Any GM that trades away a player like Carlos Gonzalez needs to lose his job, or at the very least, his Super Moneyball Genius Status.

3) The last time I saw a hitter with a weaker season-ending effort than Troy Tulowitzki against Brad Lidge tonight, his name was Terence Long and Derek Lowe was grabbing his junk.

2) The middle of the Phillies order is really not ready to stop being World Effing Champions

1) The team with the closer that had a 7+ run ERA in the regular season has a huge advantage over the team with the closer that had a 3 run ERA

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